Tuesday, July 1, 2003
I know it's been an eternity...

...since I've written. I attribute that to several things... 1. When I do get some free time, I usually don't want to spend it on the computer, I either want to sleep or get some chores done (or lay in the sun, like I was doing today :) 2. My back hurts when I sit at this computer at home - I guess it's just not ergonomically designed for me. 3. I write a lot more when I'm at work because I'm bored a lot, and I'm sitting at a computer all day, so I need to find things to do on it. And 4. I really don't know where to begin talking about this little light of my life!

On Thursday she will be 8 weeks old already. I cannot tell you how quickly time has flown since she's arrived! Last we weighed her (which was exactly two weeks ago) she was 8 pounds even. I imagine she's at least 9 by now. It's amazing how quickly she grows and changes. Even I can see the changes in her, and I see her every single day! Sometimes she will wake up from a nap and look different.

She's already had her first cold - and boy, was that a nightmare! I felt so helpless. She couldn't breath out of her nose very well, and she sounded so congested. It broke my heart. Then I got it, and so did Pete. It was a rough couple of weeks, but we got through it.

She likes to sleep, which is a really great thing. She still sleeps the majority of the day - although that's not entirely consistent, some days she doesn't seem to want to stay asleep for more than 15 minutes at time - but she seems to be generally happier if she gets in longer naps. She has had some fussy times that have been a bit tough for us, often in the early night. Luckily for me Pete is home during those hours and can give me a break. (Not so lucky for him :) It's so hard when you know all her basic needs are met, and she's still crying. I just want her to be happy! It is getting better though, and her fussy times are getting to be less and less frequent.

Her little personality is already surfacing. She definately enjoys being at home. New environments and people make her uncomfortable. We tried taking her up to the cabin, and she didn't do well. We ended up leaving early because I felt so guilty for taking her out of her comfort zone. We drove 2 hours home at 10:30 at night. Pete was wonderfully understanding about my need to get out of there. The next day, she was an angel.

I'm a bit overprotective. I've had her in to the doctor's office twice since her scheduled "well-baby" visit. First for the cold (just to be sure it wasn't something worse - I already knew there was nothing they could do for a cold). And next because I thought she might have an ear infection. It turned out she didn't (thank God) - but she had been very fussy for the previous two days and I had no idea why. The doctor told me it's just colic and all we can do is what we've already been doing. She likes movement. Sometimes she won't let you sit down... it's good exercise :) They did prescribe Baby Zantac (who knew they had such a thing?)- but I think they just did that to let me leave with some sort of hope. She doesn't have acid reflux. I gave her 4 doses and then stopped, because it wasn't making any difference (plus it tastes like crap and I felt bad when she made that little face when I gave it to her).

She always falls asleep in the car, but doesn't care for the stroller or the swing yet. She'll sit in the bouncer watching the bubbles and fishies for awhile, but gets bored after about 10 minutes. Same with the mobile. She'll watch it and listen to the music for awhile - longer than the bouncer, but never falls asleep to it and eventually wants to be picked up. Which is fine - because I feel guilty if I leave her there for even 20 minutes. It's a great mobile (Tiny Love's Symphony In Motion) - won some sort of awards because it's a great learning tool, but I think real people attention is always better.

Nursing her is going better than I ever dreamed. She caught on to that before we left the hospital, and has gained weight well. I look forward to her feedings - it's such a nice bonding time. She won't take a bottle or a pacifier. I guess she just prefers Mommy!

She's gave us her first smile before 1 month, and it still brings tears to my eyes. I finally caught it on camera, but the pictures just don't do her justice. I suppose I shouldn't go any further before showing you one of them. It's not a smiling one, because I haven't downloaded those from the camera yet - but it's a nice close-up.

Anyway, I'll try to write more in the future. After September 1st the entries will be more frequent because that's when I go back to work part-time. I'm already dreading that. I just can't imagine leaving her in anyone else's care. It breakes my heart just thinking about it... so I will need this journal to vent!

Ciao-Pazzobello

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